So God made Adam and after several years...possibly decades...God caused Adam to fall into a deep sleep and took a rib from Adam's side and created Eve. God could have created Eve the same way he created Adam - from the dust of the ground. However, that would have made Adam and Eve completely different entities rather than one. God used the rib from Adam's side to create Eve, in essence, to help Adam understand that he is incomplete without Eve.
Because Adam was created first and knew the rules of the garden, and, because he loved Eve (his perfect help-mate), they had perfect communication with each other. He would have told her the rules of the Garden to insure that she would not do something that could be hazardous to her health and well-being. And they were naked "and felt no shame".
"Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, 'Did God really say you must not eat from any tree in the garden?'" (Genesis 3:1)
Our small group discussed this last night and one of the questions that was brought up: Why did the serpent speak to the woman instead of the man?
That is a very good question; one in which we will probably never know. We speculated on this question for awhile and one of the conclusions we came to was that Eve was the newby to the garden. In Genesis 2 it was obvious that God and Adam had a relationship with each other and bringing Eve into the equation gave a bit of an opportunity for Satan to sneak in. Not that Satan couldn't have attacked Adam and not that the woman was more vulnerable but I wonder if Satan spoke directly to Eve more for the sake of seeing how Adam would respond.
Here are some of my thoughts on the matter since the discussion last night...
After creating Eve I wonder how much God was around (at least from our point of view). I kind of picture God saying, "Okay, Adam. I created your perfect help-mate. I completely trust you to protect her and take care of her because together you are my perfect creation. I'm going to step away so that you can have time with her. Remember: you are in no way better than her for I created her out of you so that only together can you be whole."
"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and they will become one flesh." (Genesis 2:24).
Satan could have picked no better tactic to ruin the perfection of God's creation than to get in between Adam and Eve. So he spoke to the woman and when Adam didn't step in to warn Eve he deceived her into doubting the rules of the garden...in other words, doubting God's rules. There is the old saying, "Curiosity killed the cat". Adam and Eve were curious about this "crafty" creature that could speak in their language. They had probably always been curious about the Tree of Knowledge but because they never had reason before to not believe what God had told them about the tree they stayed away.
I can see this playing out in my head...
Adam and Eve, holding hands, walking through the garden one day. The serpent following and observing from a distance. Maybe it's during this walk when Adam tells Eve about the tree in the middle of the garden and discussing "the rules". Maybe Adam stepped away for a moment, maybe to relieve himself, and in a moment of vulnerability Eve is left alone so the serpent confronts her.
"Did God really say you can't eat from any tree in the garden?"
"No, we can eat from any tree we want except that tree over there. He said not to even touch it or we'd die."
"Die?!!! Is that what he told you? No, no, no. You wouldn't die. In fact, it's just the opposite. When you eat from it your eyes will be opened to the truth and you will be JUST LIKE GOD, knowing good and evil."
Boy, how tempting is power? How tempting is it to do something, especially when you've been told NOT to do it and then someone comes around and tells you you've been lied to? When you are on a diet how much better does that chocolate cake look? How much tastier is that thick, juicy burger? And how strong is that guilt when we fall for it?
All at once Eve is in front of the tree looking at the fruit, and, oh, that fruit looks so good! And Adam finds her at the tree and doesn't say a word. Eve grabs some fruit, and rather than snatching it away from her and chastising her for even considering taking a bite Adam stands there and watches, overcome with curiosity. When Eve eats and nothing bad happens to her he gladly accepts the fruit from her hands.
And their eyes were opened all right. Genesis 3:7 says they realized they were naked.
Have you ever seen the childrens movie Madagascar? There is a scene where they are out in the wild and Alex (the lion), hungry from not having had a meal since there arrival, sees Marty (the Zebra) prancing around. When he looks at Marty, instead of seeing his best friend, he sees a slab of meat...dinner. Before he realizes what he's doing he has Marty's rump in his jaws and is getting ready to eat him. Once he realized what he was doing he let go and asked to be caged in to keep from attacking his friend.
I see something similar here. But more out of lust for Eve in a very inappropriate way. How else can you explain why they were all of a sudden ashamed of their nakedness? And men have struggled in their view and perception of women ever since.
Being a man I can't imagine being Adam in that situation. I know that after realizing the consequences of my actions I would have, first of all, felt extremely guilty for allowing Eve, my perfect help-mate and best friend in every way, to eat from the forbidden fruit. Then I imagine that guilt would have transformed to anger and resentment toward Eve for offering me the fruit that I had no business touching. Considering the guilt and anger and resentment (not to mention my new found sin of lust) I may have withdrawn myself from her.
So God comes into the picture, knowing what Adam and Eve had done, and he asks Adam an absurd question:
"Where are you?" Obviously, God knew where they were and what they had done. I mean...he's God!
I picture Adam behind one bush and Eve behind another bush. Adam, in an attempt to re-establish himself in his obedience to God says, "I'm over here. I heard you in the garden and I was afraid because I was naked so I hid."
"Um...Adam...who told you you were naked? You didn't disobey me, did you?" Again, God knew the truth but here he tested Adam. Was Adam going to tell the truth and take responsibility as he was the one in which God had entrusted the Garden...and even Eve? How was he going to respond?
My response probably would have been similar to Adam's. I've been caught but I'm going to try to lessen the blow by making sure that Eve is equally...if not more...at fault. After all, it was THAT WOMAN you placed in the Garden with me that offered it to me. I wouldn't have touched it if it weren't for her.
"Yes, I did but only because SHE gave it to me."
Turning to Eve God says, "What is this you have done?" (Adam breathes a sigh of relief, prematurely, thinking he's off the hook.)
I'm sure Eve thought she was done for. Her man had just abandoned her and she felt completely alone.
"The serpent deceived me into eating the fruit."
Then comes God's response. First, he cursed the Serpent (Satan) and transformed him from beautiful to hideous and basically told Satan how he was going to be destroyed. The perfect picture of Satan's destruction is in Revelations where Satan is destroyed by a woman (not a man). This scene in Revelation restores women's relationship with God.
Then God speaks to the woman saying: "From now on you're gonna bear children and it's gonna hurt. Your desire is going to be for your husband and he's gonna rule over you."
Let's take a look at that for a second. This is just my opinion but I think man has twisted the meaning of what God said to Eve ever since. I don't think it was God's design for men to rule women. What God was saying to Eve is that this is the consequence of sin and disobedience. Not that God has called or commissioned man to rule over woman but that sin and disobedience has caused man to believe they are the dominant sex. We see this when Adam put himself above Eve by betraying his perfect relationship with her and making her responsible for causing him to sin rather than accepting his role in the fall.
So here's Adam withdrawing from Eve and Eve, never having the experience of being alone, felt abandoned. So God spoke truly when he told her that her desire would be for Adam. Because she desired that relationship to be restored it opened the doors for Adam to place conditions on the relationship and "rule over" her. "From now on it's my way or the highway!"
***Keep in mind, this is simply my perspective. It's not even an opinion as much as it is simply theory. I have absolutely no idea what really transpired.***
The real curse came last...God's curse to man.
"Because you listened to your wife instead of being obedient to me:
"CURSED is the ground because of you;
through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your life.
It will produce thorns and thistles for you and you will eat the plants of the field.
By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground,
since from it you were taken;
for dust you are and to dust you will return." (Genesis 3:17-19)
You see, Adam and Eve were kicked out of the garden because of Adam - not Eve. The garden and everything in it was ultimately Adam's responsibility since it was given to him before Eve came to existence. While Eve was Adam's perfect help-mate, and in absolutely no way inferior to him, it was ultimately Adam's responsibility to protect her from harm and he failed. Because of his failure the real curse is on man...not woman.
Men - how different would our family dynamics be if we took seriously our role as protector of our families rather than being "The Ultimate Authority"? What would happen if we simply loved our wives unconditionally the way we were meant to? Loved our wives in the manner that Christ loved the church? By sacrificing ourselves for the sake of our wives? How different would our family dynamics be?
In NO WAY am I saying that men are totally responsible for failed relationships. Women are just as responsible. I do believe that is the purpose for Genesis 3 - not to point the finger of blame but to accept responsibility. To admit when we are at fault. Rather than taking responsibility and admitting to his failure Adam chose to blame Eve. The relationship between man and woman has suffered greatly ever since. As a result our relationship with God has suffered as well.
The Garden of Eden was intended to be a perfect place without blemish. When God created man and woman he did so with a perfect relationship in mind; a perfect triunal relationship between man, woman and God. When man chose disobedience it caused a blemish in the Garden. And the only way to remove that blemish from the Garden was to remove Adam and Eve.
Someone in my group last night made the comment that when we get to heaven that perfect triunal relationship between God, man and woman will be restored. We will be "naked and feel no shame".
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
The Relationship Between Man & Woman - Part 1
One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Genesis 1:27: "God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them."
This verse has two-fold meaning: 1) Unlike the rest of creation only man is made in God's image. We were created to have a perfect relationship with God as well as with each other. 2) This verse clearly states that male AND female were created in his image. That means that men and women were created on the same level. Neither is made more in the image of God than the other, neither sex is exalted and neither is depreciated. From the beginning both man and woman were placed at the pinnacle of God's creation.
At the end of creation God gave man the authority to rule over the animal and plant kingdoms. To "rule over" something is to have absolute authority and control over it. This commission of God for man wasn't simply for males. Females are every bit a part of that authority as males. Man is simply a generic term used at the beginning of the Bible for human beings - male and female.
Satan could not have used a more tactic approach to destroying God's perfect creation...making it imperfect...than by pitting males against females. We'll take a look at that aspect in part 2.
Let's take a look at the story of Adam & Eve - the first people recorded in the Bible and believed by most of the evangelical Christian world to be the first humans.
In Genesis 2 God created Adam. Now here's an interesting aspect that I never really, truly connected: while God made man his own image, in the perfect image of God, he made man from the dust of the earth. Hmmm. What does that really mean? It's not our bodies that make us who we are. It's the spirit that God breathes into man. I've always known that but never really connected the importance and meaning of that verse. It's our spirit that makes us the perfect image of God. Not our bodies. And the importance that man has placed on the body rather than the spirit over the course of history...
Can you imagine walking in Adam's shoes over the first few years of his life? The ONLY human being, living with God and the animals in the middle of this beautiful garden? To some of you that may sound like a piece of heaven. No one to nag you, no one to complain about, no one to confront. Just you and God in a perfect relationship with each other and the creation around you. However, as great as God is and that relationship you have with him, you see all the other animals around you and they have families of their own while you are the only one of your kind.
Put yourself in Adam's place for a moment. God has given you the responsibility to name all the animals so you are forced to observe the animals and you learn their tendencies. Then one day it dawns on you..."Why am I the only one of my kind?" Maybe Adam was watching the family dynamics of the gorillas one day and longed for that kind of life. God, seeing Adam's longing and knowing his desire...and knowing that he had not yet completed his perfect masterpiece, understood Adam's longing as God himself experienced loneliness in the void of timelessness and nothingness.
One of the things I love about having kids is watching my children sleep. There is something so peaceful about seeing my kids sleeping deeply in their beds. It's in those moments that my love for them completely overwhelms me. That's how I think God views us when we are sleeping. At night, looking down at us from heaven, this overwhelming love overcomes him and the things we did earlier in the day before we went to sleep is forgotten in that moment of unconditional love.
I see God watching Adam sleep overcome with love and compassion thinking, "It's not good for my son to be alone. Just like the rest of creation he needs someone at his side. Someone in his own likeness that will love him and care for him and understand him. Someone that he can have a perfect relationship with on his own level of understanding."
While Adam was sleeping (and it must have been a VERY deep sleep) God created Eve. Now here is the difference between Adam and Eve. God created Adam from the dust of the earth. He could have very easily formed Eve the same way. However, he didn't. He took a rib from Adam and formed Eve from that rib.
When Adam woke up he noticed Eve at his side. I wonder if God told Adam how he created Eve or if Adam realized that something was missing from his body. I almost like the latter theory better. Adam wakes up, sees Eve, feels there is something missing in his own body and realizes that God used a part of him to create his perfect mate. Adam's response is classic:
"This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman' for she was taken out of man." (Genesis 2:23)
Adam was so amazed by Eve; so overwhelmed with gratitude. Can you imagine how he must have responded to God? "Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!" I would be willing to bet that Adam was so filled with emotion that he cried and so full of love for Eve from the moment he set eyes on her. In that moment God's masterpiece was complete. Trinity. Three in one. God...man...woman. A perfect and complete relationship with God in the middle.
God could have very easily made Eve from the dust of the earth the way he made Adam. However, that would have made man and woman separate entities and the relationship would have been different. It would have been like trying to get a cat and a dog to have a perfect relationship with each other. With this in mind there is no reason for us to think that one sex is better than the other. They were meant to compliment and complete each other and rule together, hand in hand.
THAT was the way God intended.
This verse has two-fold meaning: 1) Unlike the rest of creation only man is made in God's image. We were created to have a perfect relationship with God as well as with each other. 2) This verse clearly states that male AND female were created in his image. That means that men and women were created on the same level. Neither is made more in the image of God than the other, neither sex is exalted and neither is depreciated. From the beginning both man and woman were placed at the pinnacle of God's creation.
At the end of creation God gave man the authority to rule over the animal and plant kingdoms. To "rule over" something is to have absolute authority and control over it. This commission of God for man wasn't simply for males. Females are every bit a part of that authority as males. Man is simply a generic term used at the beginning of the Bible for human beings - male and female.
Satan could not have used a more tactic approach to destroying God's perfect creation...making it imperfect...than by pitting males against females. We'll take a look at that aspect in part 2.
Let's take a look at the story of Adam & Eve - the first people recorded in the Bible and believed by most of the evangelical Christian world to be the first humans.
In Genesis 2 God created Adam. Now here's an interesting aspect that I never really, truly connected: while God made man his own image, in the perfect image of God, he made man from the dust of the earth. Hmmm. What does that really mean? It's not our bodies that make us who we are. It's the spirit that God breathes into man. I've always known that but never really connected the importance and meaning of that verse. It's our spirit that makes us the perfect image of God. Not our bodies. And the importance that man has placed on the body rather than the spirit over the course of history...
Can you imagine walking in Adam's shoes over the first few years of his life? The ONLY human being, living with God and the animals in the middle of this beautiful garden? To some of you that may sound like a piece of heaven. No one to nag you, no one to complain about, no one to confront. Just you and God in a perfect relationship with each other and the creation around you. However, as great as God is and that relationship you have with him, you see all the other animals around you and they have families of their own while you are the only one of your kind.
Put yourself in Adam's place for a moment. God has given you the responsibility to name all the animals so you are forced to observe the animals and you learn their tendencies. Then one day it dawns on you..."Why am I the only one of my kind?" Maybe Adam was watching the family dynamics of the gorillas one day and longed for that kind of life. God, seeing Adam's longing and knowing his desire...and knowing that he had not yet completed his perfect masterpiece, understood Adam's longing as God himself experienced loneliness in the void of timelessness and nothingness.
One of the things I love about having kids is watching my children sleep. There is something so peaceful about seeing my kids sleeping deeply in their beds. It's in those moments that my love for them completely overwhelms me. That's how I think God views us when we are sleeping. At night, looking down at us from heaven, this overwhelming love overcomes him and the things we did earlier in the day before we went to sleep is forgotten in that moment of unconditional love.
I see God watching Adam sleep overcome with love and compassion thinking, "It's not good for my son to be alone. Just like the rest of creation he needs someone at his side. Someone in his own likeness that will love him and care for him and understand him. Someone that he can have a perfect relationship with on his own level of understanding."
While Adam was sleeping (and it must have been a VERY deep sleep) God created Eve. Now here is the difference between Adam and Eve. God created Adam from the dust of the earth. He could have very easily formed Eve the same way. However, he didn't. He took a rib from Adam and formed Eve from that rib.
When Adam woke up he noticed Eve at his side. I wonder if God told Adam how he created Eve or if Adam realized that something was missing from his body. I almost like the latter theory better. Adam wakes up, sees Eve, feels there is something missing in his own body and realizes that God used a part of him to create his perfect mate. Adam's response is classic:
"This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman' for she was taken out of man." (Genesis 2:23)
Adam was so amazed by Eve; so overwhelmed with gratitude. Can you imagine how he must have responded to God? "Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!" I would be willing to bet that Adam was so filled with emotion that he cried and so full of love for Eve from the moment he set eyes on her. In that moment God's masterpiece was complete. Trinity. Three in one. God...man...woman. A perfect and complete relationship with God in the middle.
God could have very easily made Eve from the dust of the earth the way he made Adam. However, that would have made man and woman separate entities and the relationship would have been different. It would have been like trying to get a cat and a dog to have a perfect relationship with each other. With this in mind there is no reason for us to think that one sex is better than the other. They were meant to compliment and complete each other and rule together, hand in hand.
THAT was the way God intended.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
In The Beginning...
I love how the Bible opens up: "In the beginning God..." Before there was even such a thing as "anything" was God. That is the most fundamental truth of Christianity (also Judaism, Islam, and many other world religions). The rest of the Bible may be debatable but the very first phrase of the Bible is ultimate truth.
To me the first phrase of the Bible is also very comforting: "In the beginning God". In the great void of nothingness was God. Outside the realm of time...God. There is NOTHING that is outside of God. Despite the darkness and emptiness and loneliness that we may feel at times...God is right there. David describes it best when he said,
Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast. (Psalm 139:7-10)
"In the beginning God created". In other words, God was the Creator of everything. Every breath we take, every heartbeat points to a creation. Where did that creation ultimately come from? I've often said that it takes more faith to be an atheist (someone who refuses to believe in God regardless of the evidence) than someone who believes in an ultimate Creator.
Moses begins his story of Genesis by captivating the essence of God as Creator. I love the first chapter of Genesis. I can't help but think of an artist who is creating a masterpiece. Every so often the artist takes a step back and looks at his work and thinks, "This is good!" And that's exactly what God does during this first chapter of Genesis...after completing a part of his work he steps back, looks at what he just did and likes what he sees. Moses, in our Western translations of the Bible, describes these times when God steps back as "days".
One of the things that we tend to get stuck on is the time frame of creation. And many people just cannot get past this. After each significant creation Moses, in the Western translation of the original Hebrew, uses the term "day". Over the course of the past hundred years or so Genesis 1 has become one of the most debated chapters in the Bible simply for this reason. Really, when it comes down to it, does it matter if God created everything within a literal 7 day time frame or, rather than a literal 7 days, each day represents a period of time? Does it really matter? In the grand scheme of all creation...does it matter?
I think when we get stuck on the time frame of creation we completely miss the point of the message that Moses is attempting to relay to us. And when we turn that message into a debate what happens is that we alienate people which could turn them away from what God ultimately wants...a relationship. Isn't that really the whole point of Genesis 1? Let's take a look at it.
As an artist God begins his painting by creating the foundation: the heavens and the earth. Out of the emptiness and darkness of nothingness God began forming the foundation -- water -- and after the water he formed light. He steps back and takes a break. Day 1.
After creating the foundation of water and light he created an expanse and separated the water to create "sky". He takes another break. Day 2.
He then creates dry ground (land) and separates the land from the water (seas). This time he steps back and before taking a break he looks at his work and says, "Hey, this is good. Hmmm...what else can I put in here? The land is too brown. Let's add some green." And the first sign of life is created: vegetation. Plants and trees that bear fruit with seed in it so that it will reproduce. On Day 3 God created the idea of production so that the world can begin forming on it's own...in other words his art is now beginning to come to life. God takes another step back, likes what he sees and takes another break.
When God comes back the next "day" he looks at his creation and thinks, "Let's separate the light from the dark. And the light and the dark will mark seasons and days and years." In other words, time did not even exist until what Genesis 1 describes as Day 4 of creation. So, again, why do we get so stuck on a literal 7 day period of creation? Why do we try to prove the existence of God through the theory of a literal 7 day creation when the best theologians in this world can't even agree on the exact translation? Is that really the point? Back to Genesis 1...
So after creating "Time" God steps back, calls his work good and takes another break.
The next "day" God looks at his creation, the land, water, vegetation and continues to add by creating fish and birds and commissions them to reproduce throughout the seas and the land and the work comes more to life. This may have been a little exhausting to God because rather than taking a look at his creation to see if it's good he simply takes a break.
He returns to his creation the next day by adding in livestock and wild animals. He takes a step back, sees that it is good, and says, "Now it's time to finish this up. Let's create man in our image, in our likeness, and when we are done creating man (and woman) we'll give them all that we have created as a gift."
Genesis 1:27 says: "So God created man in his own image in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them."
After God created man he steps back, takes a look at all that he had made and says, "Wow! This is VERY good!"
This is the point I think Moses was trying to get across. Not to get stuck on timing of creation but the overall picture of creation. Here's Moses point: God knew before he even started creating his ultimate masterpiece how he was going to finish it. He knew he was going to finish it by creating images of his own likeness -- you and me. Why? In the beginning he was completely alone and all of us, including God, yearn for relationship. He created us so that he could have a relationship with us. You see, without us God's creation would be incomplete. Without you this world would be incomplete.
If you ever get to wondering why you exist know that you are a part of the complete picture. Without you there would be a blemish to God's masterpiece. And the ultimate reason why you exist, even more so than the completion of his masterpiece, is so that God can have a relationship with you.
To me the first phrase of the Bible is also very comforting: "In the beginning God". In the great void of nothingness was God. Outside the realm of time...God. There is NOTHING that is outside of God. Despite the darkness and emptiness and loneliness that we may feel at times...God is right there. David describes it best when he said,
Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast. (Psalm 139:7-10)
"In the beginning God created". In other words, God was the Creator of everything. Every breath we take, every heartbeat points to a creation. Where did that creation ultimately come from? I've often said that it takes more faith to be an atheist (someone who refuses to believe in God regardless of the evidence) than someone who believes in an ultimate Creator.
Moses begins his story of Genesis by captivating the essence of God as Creator. I love the first chapter of Genesis. I can't help but think of an artist who is creating a masterpiece. Every so often the artist takes a step back and looks at his work and thinks, "This is good!" And that's exactly what God does during this first chapter of Genesis...after completing a part of his work he steps back, looks at what he just did and likes what he sees. Moses, in our Western translations of the Bible, describes these times when God steps back as "days".
One of the things that we tend to get stuck on is the time frame of creation. And many people just cannot get past this. After each significant creation Moses, in the Western translation of the original Hebrew, uses the term "day". Over the course of the past hundred years or so Genesis 1 has become one of the most debated chapters in the Bible simply for this reason. Really, when it comes down to it, does it matter if God created everything within a literal 7 day time frame or, rather than a literal 7 days, each day represents a period of time? Does it really matter? In the grand scheme of all creation...does it matter?
I think when we get stuck on the time frame of creation we completely miss the point of the message that Moses is attempting to relay to us. And when we turn that message into a debate what happens is that we alienate people which could turn them away from what God ultimately wants...a relationship. Isn't that really the whole point of Genesis 1? Let's take a look at it.
As an artist God begins his painting by creating the foundation: the heavens and the earth. Out of the emptiness and darkness of nothingness God began forming the foundation -- water -- and after the water he formed light. He steps back and takes a break. Day 1.
After creating the foundation of water and light he created an expanse and separated the water to create "sky". He takes another break. Day 2.
He then creates dry ground (land) and separates the land from the water (seas). This time he steps back and before taking a break he looks at his work and says, "Hey, this is good. Hmmm...what else can I put in here? The land is too brown. Let's add some green." And the first sign of life is created: vegetation. Plants and trees that bear fruit with seed in it so that it will reproduce. On Day 3 God created the idea of production so that the world can begin forming on it's own...in other words his art is now beginning to come to life. God takes another step back, likes what he sees and takes another break.
When God comes back the next "day" he looks at his creation and thinks, "Let's separate the light from the dark. And the light and the dark will mark seasons and days and years." In other words, time did not even exist until what Genesis 1 describes as Day 4 of creation. So, again, why do we get so stuck on a literal 7 day period of creation? Why do we try to prove the existence of God through the theory of a literal 7 day creation when the best theologians in this world can't even agree on the exact translation? Is that really the point? Back to Genesis 1...
So after creating "Time" God steps back, calls his work good and takes another break.
The next "day" God looks at his creation, the land, water, vegetation and continues to add by creating fish and birds and commissions them to reproduce throughout the seas and the land and the work comes more to life. This may have been a little exhausting to God because rather than taking a look at his creation to see if it's good he simply takes a break.
He returns to his creation the next day by adding in livestock and wild animals. He takes a step back, sees that it is good, and says, "Now it's time to finish this up. Let's create man in our image, in our likeness, and when we are done creating man (and woman) we'll give them all that we have created as a gift."
Genesis 1:27 says: "So God created man in his own image in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them."
After God created man he steps back, takes a look at all that he had made and says, "Wow! This is VERY good!"
This is the point I think Moses was trying to get across. Not to get stuck on timing of creation but the overall picture of creation. Here's Moses point: God knew before he even started creating his ultimate masterpiece how he was going to finish it. He knew he was going to finish it by creating images of his own likeness -- you and me. Why? In the beginning he was completely alone and all of us, including God, yearn for relationship. He created us so that he could have a relationship with us. You see, without us God's creation would be incomplete. Without you this world would be incomplete.
If you ever get to wondering why you exist know that you are a part of the complete picture. Without you there would be a blemish to God's masterpiece. And the ultimate reason why you exist, even more so than the completion of his masterpiece, is so that God can have a relationship with you.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Happy New Year!
Another year has come and gone...another new year begins. I never quite know how to feel this time of year. A week ago we celebrated the coming of Jesus into the world -- a baby, born of a virgin...step-son of a carpenter...God incarnate. How can this be?
I love the means in which each year ends. After a long year, despite what may have happened throughout the year...good or bad, Christmas gives us the opportunity to remember how God came to us and the hope we have through him. The New Year provides us an opportunity, in a sense, to start over. We cannot necessarily control our current situations and a new year does not necessarily mean relief. However, it gives us an opportunity to refocus. We cannot always control our circumstances but we can control how we react or respond to obstacles that get in our way:
Are we going to respond negatively to challenges or are we going to face them head on? Are we going to accept the challenge or are we going to lay down and give up?
I love the way John starts off his gospel:
"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness but the darkness has not understood it."
Have you ever felt that your life is too complicated for God to understand...let alone those around you? Have you ever felt that you are completely alone with no way out? That's where God comes in. God created the entire universe which means that he created you, too. Jesus Christ is the Creator of life and his life brings light to mankind. Regardless of how dark the world around us may seem, if we just cling to the hope that God has provided to us through Jesus Christ we can overcome that darkness.
2 Corinthians 5:17 says: "If anyone is in Christ he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come."
Do you understand what that means? We don't necessarily have the means to control the circumstances that we face. However, by giving yourself to Christ he will give you the strength to stand up. Your old life, or your old ways, are gone. If you give yourself to Christ you are a new creation. As long as you are willing to let go of the past you have the hope of the future.
As we enter into this New Year do so with the hope of a new beginning. Again, our current circumstances may not allow us the opportunity to completely start fresh. But we a new beginning gives us the opportunity to face up to our situations with God in the drivers seat.
Happy New Year, everyone!
I love the means in which each year ends. After a long year, despite what may have happened throughout the year...good or bad, Christmas gives us the opportunity to remember how God came to us and the hope we have through him. The New Year provides us an opportunity, in a sense, to start over. We cannot necessarily control our current situations and a new year does not necessarily mean relief. However, it gives us an opportunity to refocus. We cannot always control our circumstances but we can control how we react or respond to obstacles that get in our way:
Are we going to respond negatively to challenges or are we going to face them head on? Are we going to accept the challenge or are we going to lay down and give up?
I love the way John starts off his gospel:
"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness but the darkness has not understood it."
Have you ever felt that your life is too complicated for God to understand...let alone those around you? Have you ever felt that you are completely alone with no way out? That's where God comes in. God created the entire universe which means that he created you, too. Jesus Christ is the Creator of life and his life brings light to mankind. Regardless of how dark the world around us may seem, if we just cling to the hope that God has provided to us through Jesus Christ we can overcome that darkness.
2 Corinthians 5:17 says: "If anyone is in Christ he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come."
Do you understand what that means? We don't necessarily have the means to control the circumstances that we face. However, by giving yourself to Christ he will give you the strength to stand up. Your old life, or your old ways, are gone. If you give yourself to Christ you are a new creation. As long as you are willing to let go of the past you have the hope of the future.
As we enter into this New Year do so with the hope of a new beginning. Again, our current circumstances may not allow us the opportunity to completely start fresh. But we a new beginning gives us the opportunity to face up to our situations with God in the drivers seat.
Happy New Year, everyone!
Friday, December 30, 2011
The Importance of Friendship
Now that Christmas is over and a new year dawns I have time to reflect on this past year. My favorite Christmas movie of all time is "It's A Wonderful Life". At the end of the movie Clarence - George Bailey's Guardian Angel (Second Class) - leaves his book "Tom Sawyer" to George Bailey. Inside the cover is written, "Remember, no man is a failure who has friends."
This year has been a reminder to us just how important friendship is. Friendship brings about community. When you have friends you have people who are behind you and supporting you. Through good or bad you know who you can depend on and who really truly care about you. Though this year has been somewhat of a stagnant year for us in that nothing significant happened - good or bad - there have been times throughout this year where friends have thought of us in small ways to remind us of the reminder that Clarence left George Bailey.
It is so easy to get caught up in the negative side of life. Life tends to come to a head all at once and sometimes it seems like there is no way out. Or the other common thought, "What's next?" But it's through those times that friends, when you trust them enough to open yourself to them, prove just how much they really think of you.
God uses the people in our lives to help us stand up when life seems to cave in around us. That's why our faith, not only in God, but also in the people that God has placed in our lives, is so important. When we live our lives the very best we can those around us want to do what they can to help us move forward.
The story of George Bailey is so intriguing to me even though it's a fictional story. (However, there are a lot of George Bailey types in the world that go unrecognized.) Here is a man who was on a mission. He was going to travel the world. He was driven with ambition to build and make money. Then his dad died and his dad's business was at risk of closing due to the money-mongering Henry F. Potter.
Mr. Potter had no regard to the lives of the people in the community. In fact, in his eyes the people living in the community were lazy and worthless. They deserved to live in poverty while he hoarded their money. His rival, Peter Bailey (George's dad), was more concerned about the people in the community than he was about his own welfare. In fact, it was his passion for the people and his fight against Mr. Potter to protect the people in Bedford Falls that eventually led to his death.
Rather than leaving to fulfill his dream, George Bailey stayed to make sure that his father's legacy lived on. In fact, he even sacrificed his own education to make sure that his younger brother had an opportunity to move on.
Throughout the story it's obvious that George was frustrated with his life and discontent that he was never able to follow through with his dreams. In fact, there is a point where Mr. Potter offered George Bailey a job that would secure him and his family financially for the rest of their lives including trips to Europe. George, knowing what the opportunity could mean for his family, almost took it. Then he realized what it would mean to the community if the Building and Loan closed down.
Sacrificing his own dreams and ambitions for the sake of the community George Bailey stuck around to insure that the people of Bedford Falls had the opportunity to live a decent lifestyle. With the encouragement of his new bride he even gave away his honeymoon. What happened in the end? His uncle loses $8,000 and rather than turning him in he takes the blame and Potter calls the police to have him arrested.
Sitting in a bar he turns to God. He's at the lowest point of his life and decides it's time to turn to God. After praying to God he's confronted by the husband of his daughter's teacher who hits him square in the jaw and I'm sure he was thinking, "What's next? Everything around me is falling apart. I pray to God and get hit in the face."
Has that ever happened to you? You pray to God for help only to have yet another bad situation arise?
That's when God really shows up though. Not through some miraculous energy or power that wipes everything away. He shows up through the people in our lives. He shows up through our friends. He shows up through the people who really, truly love us and care about us.
As long as we live our lives to the very best of our ability God will always come through for us. Maybe not by means in which we would like him to, but through the generosity and hospitality of those God has placed in our lives. Don't take your relationships with other people for granted. As long as you are honestly living your life to the best of your ability your friends will always come through for you in difficult times.
This year has been a reminder to us just how important friendship is. Friendship brings about community. When you have friends you have people who are behind you and supporting you. Through good or bad you know who you can depend on and who really truly care about you. Though this year has been somewhat of a stagnant year for us in that nothing significant happened - good or bad - there have been times throughout this year where friends have thought of us in small ways to remind us of the reminder that Clarence left George Bailey.
It is so easy to get caught up in the negative side of life. Life tends to come to a head all at once and sometimes it seems like there is no way out. Or the other common thought, "What's next?" But it's through those times that friends, when you trust them enough to open yourself to them, prove just how much they really think of you.
God uses the people in our lives to help us stand up when life seems to cave in around us. That's why our faith, not only in God, but also in the people that God has placed in our lives, is so important. When we live our lives the very best we can those around us want to do what they can to help us move forward.
The story of George Bailey is so intriguing to me even though it's a fictional story. (However, there are a lot of George Bailey types in the world that go unrecognized.) Here is a man who was on a mission. He was going to travel the world. He was driven with ambition to build and make money. Then his dad died and his dad's business was at risk of closing due to the money-mongering Henry F. Potter.
Mr. Potter had no regard to the lives of the people in the community. In fact, in his eyes the people living in the community were lazy and worthless. They deserved to live in poverty while he hoarded their money. His rival, Peter Bailey (George's dad), was more concerned about the people in the community than he was about his own welfare. In fact, it was his passion for the people and his fight against Mr. Potter to protect the people in Bedford Falls that eventually led to his death.
Rather than leaving to fulfill his dream, George Bailey stayed to make sure that his father's legacy lived on. In fact, he even sacrificed his own education to make sure that his younger brother had an opportunity to move on.
Throughout the story it's obvious that George was frustrated with his life and discontent that he was never able to follow through with his dreams. In fact, there is a point where Mr. Potter offered George Bailey a job that would secure him and his family financially for the rest of their lives including trips to Europe. George, knowing what the opportunity could mean for his family, almost took it. Then he realized what it would mean to the community if the Building and Loan closed down.
Sacrificing his own dreams and ambitions for the sake of the community George Bailey stuck around to insure that the people of Bedford Falls had the opportunity to live a decent lifestyle. With the encouragement of his new bride he even gave away his honeymoon. What happened in the end? His uncle loses $8,000 and rather than turning him in he takes the blame and Potter calls the police to have him arrested.
Sitting in a bar he turns to God. He's at the lowest point of his life and decides it's time to turn to God. After praying to God he's confronted by the husband of his daughter's teacher who hits him square in the jaw and I'm sure he was thinking, "What's next? Everything around me is falling apart. I pray to God and get hit in the face."
Has that ever happened to you? You pray to God for help only to have yet another bad situation arise?
That's when God really shows up though. Not through some miraculous energy or power that wipes everything away. He shows up through the people in our lives. He shows up through our friends. He shows up through the people who really, truly love us and care about us.
As long as we live our lives to the very best of our ability God will always come through for us. Maybe not by means in which we would like him to, but through the generosity and hospitality of those God has placed in our lives. Don't take your relationships with other people for granted. As long as you are honestly living your life to the best of your ability your friends will always come through for you in difficult times.
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
God's Gift to Humanity
For me this is the most wonderful time of the year. For me it doesn't get better than Thanksgiving to New Years. I love Christmas songs and Christmas movies. This is the one time of year that I do not mind shopping. I love to people watch during this time. I love to watch the excitement in children as the anticipation of Christmas nears. But then there's also another side...and I can see it in people's eyes.
This time of year can be very depressing. For a lot of people this time of year is a reminder of the hopelessness that they dwell in. People who have lost loved one's and find themselves alone during "the most festive time of the year". Marriages that have gone bad and the fight over who is going to have the children for Christmas. Christmas is not a happy, joyful time but a stressful time. People who are scraping to get by and feel guilty because they can't afford to buy presents for their children as commercial after commercial after commercial explains "the true meaning of Christmas" and what "children need most".
Then I read articles or facebook posts or listen to news reports on the radio (especially now that we are within a year of the next Presidential election) of how unfair the new tax laws are toward people who have good paying jobs and can afford to pay taxes. How poor people who are struggling to scrape by should pay the government back if they receive more in their return than what they paid out in the year. How everyone in America has the same opportunities and how obvious it is that the reason people are in their situations is because they are lazy and have made bad financial decisions. I've actually heard these things. I actually heard someone say that there would not be a single person in poverty in the US if everyone simply worked hard and were fiscally responsible. Hmmm.
And a lot of this comes from conservative Christianity who say they believe in God and love God with all their hearts and how God has blessed them because of their faithfulness to God while looking down on those who obviously do not have God's blessing.
I thank my God and Savior in heaven that He does not have this same mindset.
When God decided to invade this earth He did so by coming to a young, teenage girl who was betrothed to a simple carpenter. Carpenter's in the Bible were commoners; blue-collar workers. While they were not necessarily poor they definitely were not associated with the wealthy. They were a hard-working, blue-collar class of people that earned every single penny they got. In other words, when God came to this earth He did not choose wealth to "grow up" in. He chose to associate Himself with common people. And what's the definition of common? Belonging equally to an entire community, nation, or culture.
The first visitor's to welcome Jesus into the world? Shepherds. Now shepherd's were the muck of society. No one associated with shepherds. They were uneducated at best. You couldn't trust a shepherd. And yet the angels first appeared to announce the arrival of the King of the Universe to this group of people. After meeting Jesus they were so excited that they ran out and told everyone and "the people were amazed".
What's interesting is that the next group of people that the Bible mentions that were made aware of Jesus' coming was a group of wise-men -- philosopher's and astrologer's, aka pagan's. They came from outside mainstream religion of the time. And they brought him gifts that were only given to kings and priests.
It is impossible for me to consider Christmas without thinking of how God came into this world and for what purpose. God's greatest gift -- Jesus; God in the flesh -- was given to ALL of humanity. Not just the wealthy. Not just the religious. Everyone.
God is not interested in wealth. He is not interested in religion. He is not interested in politics. He is interested in you. You are the reason He came into this world. You are the reason why He invaded humanity. You are the reason why we celebrate this time of year. If God were not interested in you there would be no reason for Him to have come into this world. There would be no reason for Christmas.
As another Christmas dawns upon us, regardless of what life may be dealing you, reflect on the real reason for Christmas and the hope that has been given to us.
This time of year can be very depressing. For a lot of people this time of year is a reminder of the hopelessness that they dwell in. People who have lost loved one's and find themselves alone during "the most festive time of the year". Marriages that have gone bad and the fight over who is going to have the children for Christmas. Christmas is not a happy, joyful time but a stressful time. People who are scraping to get by and feel guilty because they can't afford to buy presents for their children as commercial after commercial after commercial explains "the true meaning of Christmas" and what "children need most".
Then I read articles or facebook posts or listen to news reports on the radio (especially now that we are within a year of the next Presidential election) of how unfair the new tax laws are toward people who have good paying jobs and can afford to pay taxes. How poor people who are struggling to scrape by should pay the government back if they receive more in their return than what they paid out in the year. How everyone in America has the same opportunities and how obvious it is that the reason people are in their situations is because they are lazy and have made bad financial decisions. I've actually heard these things. I actually heard someone say that there would not be a single person in poverty in the US if everyone simply worked hard and were fiscally responsible. Hmmm.
And a lot of this comes from conservative Christianity who say they believe in God and love God with all their hearts and how God has blessed them because of their faithfulness to God while looking down on those who obviously do not have God's blessing.
I thank my God and Savior in heaven that He does not have this same mindset.
When God decided to invade this earth He did so by coming to a young, teenage girl who was betrothed to a simple carpenter. Carpenter's in the Bible were commoners; blue-collar workers. While they were not necessarily poor they definitely were not associated with the wealthy. They were a hard-working, blue-collar class of people that earned every single penny they got. In other words, when God came to this earth He did not choose wealth to "grow up" in. He chose to associate Himself with common people. And what's the definition of common? Belonging equally to an entire community, nation, or culture.
The first visitor's to welcome Jesus into the world? Shepherds. Now shepherd's were the muck of society. No one associated with shepherds. They were uneducated at best. You couldn't trust a shepherd. And yet the angels first appeared to announce the arrival of the King of the Universe to this group of people. After meeting Jesus they were so excited that they ran out and told everyone and "the people were amazed".
What's interesting is that the next group of people that the Bible mentions that were made aware of Jesus' coming was a group of wise-men -- philosopher's and astrologer's, aka pagan's. They came from outside mainstream religion of the time. And they brought him gifts that were only given to kings and priests.
It is impossible for me to consider Christmas without thinking of how God came into this world and for what purpose. God's greatest gift -- Jesus; God in the flesh -- was given to ALL of humanity. Not just the wealthy. Not just the religious. Everyone.
God is not interested in wealth. He is not interested in religion. He is not interested in politics. He is interested in you. You are the reason He came into this world. You are the reason why He invaded humanity. You are the reason why we celebrate this time of year. If God were not interested in you there would be no reason for Him to have come into this world. There would be no reason for Christmas.
As another Christmas dawns upon us, regardless of what life may be dealing you, reflect on the real reason for Christmas and the hope that has been given to us.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Searching For...What?
It was 2 years ago yesterday when I basically found out that my time in my last church staff position as Worship and Small Groups Pastor was coming to an end. I was talking to a friend who was also a board member of the church I was on staff at the time and the topic of church finances came up as the church was struggling financially. I made a comment that I didn't feel like I would have a job come the new year and my friend got real quiet and didn't say another word about it. He quickly changed the subject without even asking me why I felt that way. 2 weeks later the pastor offered to give me the Christmas Eve service and the next 2 Sunday's off so that Joy and I could make a trip to Michigan for Christmas. The morning of our return we were greeted to a phone call from the pastor asking both Joy and me to a meeting with him and a member of the church board. That meeting was to inform me that the board had made the decision to terminate the position they had called me to. To me it didn't feel like so much a termination due to cutbacks as it felt like I had just been fired.
Despite the painful separation from the church I felt more than ever God's calling for me to be in ministry. Even though that position only lasted 9 months I was confident in my ability and God's calling. Over the next several months I searched and searched for a new ministry position sure that God was leading us forward. I had interviews with several churches. We even made a drive to Savannah, GA where I "auditioned" for a worship leader position. I was even told on several occasions that it was obvious that I had the heart and passion of a pastor. However, all of those opportunities fell through. Despite my "heart and passion" for ministry I was never quite good enough as a performer to meet the expectations of what churches were looking for. Even as recently as this past Spring we went through the same thing with another church right here in the Raleigh area.
I thought I was pretty much over my depression and the pain of rejection until we ventured north to see family for Thanksgiving. After spending a week with family, before getting into the car to head back, Grace - our 7 year old daughter - said, "I don't want to go back to North Carolina. I want to stay up here with my grandparents."
Regret...remorse...failure...depression...all these feelings and more overcame me after my daughter made that statement. It's been nearly a week since we came back and yet I'm still dealing with those feelings. Why did I move my family to North Carolina where we would have no other family support locally? We moved to North Carolina for the purpose of ministering to people and over the last nearly 2 years we have been a charity cause. We have had to depend on so many people in order to get through. Not that there is anything wrong with that considering we really are in need and we're doing our best to make ends meet but I definitely would rather give than be given to. And there have been people who have given to us who weren't much better off than us. That is very humbling when others who are in need see your need and give to you. Never have I felt so worthless than I have the past 2 years.
I don't regret meeting the people that we have met since we moved down here but I do regret the move so far away from our extended family when it affects my children. I feel like we are missing out on so many things with our nieces and nephews (I met my 18-month old Great Nephew for the first time last week) and our families are missing out on seeing Grace and Eli grow and develop. I feel like we're missing out on so many things with the friends that we left behind.
I really believe the only reason why we decided to stay in North Carolina (besides the fact that there is no employment to be found in Michigan) is because of the church family that has more or less adopted us in -- LifePointe Christian Church. They have given us opportunities to get involved in different things: Joy with the children's program and me with the youth group and we also lead a Life Group together. And I especially feel the importance of being here to support and encourage our pastor and his wife at the LifePointe Downtown location because my wife and I understand just how difficult it is to be young and in ministry. Not only do we want to support and encourage them; more importantly we believe in them and what they are doing. Had it not been for LifePointe I really don't know what would have become of us. Because of them I recommitted my life to God when I would have otherwise given up.
However, despite the new life that God has given us through LifePointe there is still an emptiness; a feeling that I'm never going to measure up. A feeling that I'm all washed up at 38. I was so sure of God's calling 2 years ago despite the turn of events that happened at the last church. I would have moved my family all the way across the country because I was certain of God's direction regardless of where he would lead us. But after two years of seeking and being turned down time and time again I question if God ever really did "call" me. Maybe my calling was simply that: MY calling. Not God's.
So now I'm left wondering, yet again, after making a trip to Michigan to spend Thanksgiving week with family and old friends, what our purpose is down here. Is there even such a thing as A PURPOSE? As much as I love LifePointe Church I know they can get along just fine without us. In the grand scheme of things we're not "needed". We're basically there to fill a couple of holes that would be filled regardless.
Don't let this fool you. Things are not as bleak in my mind as you may read into it. These are just thoughts and feelings that I needed to get out and writing is therapeutic for me. We really do like it here in Raleigh and we LOVE LifePointe Church...especially LifePointe Downtown. Just still searching my way through my thoughts and feelings and desires.
Despite the painful separation from the church I felt more than ever God's calling for me to be in ministry. Even though that position only lasted 9 months I was confident in my ability and God's calling. Over the next several months I searched and searched for a new ministry position sure that God was leading us forward. I had interviews with several churches. We even made a drive to Savannah, GA where I "auditioned" for a worship leader position. I was even told on several occasions that it was obvious that I had the heart and passion of a pastor. However, all of those opportunities fell through. Despite my "heart and passion" for ministry I was never quite good enough as a performer to meet the expectations of what churches were looking for. Even as recently as this past Spring we went through the same thing with another church right here in the Raleigh area.
I thought I was pretty much over my depression and the pain of rejection until we ventured north to see family for Thanksgiving. After spending a week with family, before getting into the car to head back, Grace - our 7 year old daughter - said, "I don't want to go back to North Carolina. I want to stay up here with my grandparents."
Regret...remorse...failure...depression...all these feelings and more overcame me after my daughter made that statement. It's been nearly a week since we came back and yet I'm still dealing with those feelings. Why did I move my family to North Carolina where we would have no other family support locally? We moved to North Carolina for the purpose of ministering to people and over the last nearly 2 years we have been a charity cause. We have had to depend on so many people in order to get through. Not that there is anything wrong with that considering we really are in need and we're doing our best to make ends meet but I definitely would rather give than be given to. And there have been people who have given to us who weren't much better off than us. That is very humbling when others who are in need see your need and give to you. Never have I felt so worthless than I have the past 2 years.
I don't regret meeting the people that we have met since we moved down here but I do regret the move so far away from our extended family when it affects my children. I feel like we are missing out on so many things with our nieces and nephews (I met my 18-month old Great Nephew for the first time last week) and our families are missing out on seeing Grace and Eli grow and develop. I feel like we're missing out on so many things with the friends that we left behind.
I really believe the only reason why we decided to stay in North Carolina (besides the fact that there is no employment to be found in Michigan) is because of the church family that has more or less adopted us in -- LifePointe Christian Church. They have given us opportunities to get involved in different things: Joy with the children's program and me with the youth group and we also lead a Life Group together. And I especially feel the importance of being here to support and encourage our pastor and his wife at the LifePointe Downtown location because my wife and I understand just how difficult it is to be young and in ministry. Not only do we want to support and encourage them; more importantly we believe in them and what they are doing. Had it not been for LifePointe I really don't know what would have become of us. Because of them I recommitted my life to God when I would have otherwise given up.
However, despite the new life that God has given us through LifePointe there is still an emptiness; a feeling that I'm never going to measure up. A feeling that I'm all washed up at 38. I was so sure of God's calling 2 years ago despite the turn of events that happened at the last church. I would have moved my family all the way across the country because I was certain of God's direction regardless of where he would lead us. But after two years of seeking and being turned down time and time again I question if God ever really did "call" me. Maybe my calling was simply that: MY calling. Not God's.
So now I'm left wondering, yet again, after making a trip to Michigan to spend Thanksgiving week with family and old friends, what our purpose is down here. Is there even such a thing as A PURPOSE? As much as I love LifePointe Church I know they can get along just fine without us. In the grand scheme of things we're not "needed". We're basically there to fill a couple of holes that would be filled regardless.
Don't let this fool you. Things are not as bleak in my mind as you may read into it. These are just thoughts and feelings that I needed to get out and writing is therapeutic for me. We really do like it here in Raleigh and we LOVE LifePointe Church...especially LifePointe Downtown. Just still searching my way through my thoughts and feelings and desires.
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